This was the thing since I have met
you, if we never see each other again and one day I feel a certain
presence. The day I saw you, i felt the cloud begin to lift a litil bit. May be I was quite wrong about destiny thinking that it's the
bridge we build o the one we love the most. Anyways I hope that I've
healed during the years apart, and I'm sitting with you while you
read this. But if I'm not, it's not because I don't love you, It's
because I do, and I do miss you a lot. This doesn't mean that I'm not
better and the story ain't just over yet. May be the reason is we
just live in the physical world we can just touch, or we do live in
the world that we create with our heart. As for the question of my
destiny all I know is that even when destiny wants to accomplish
something, it can't do it alone. I still have to go to the place and
show up and wait the hours you have waited for me, so that I can
build a bridge to you. With a hope, a never ending hope. May be that's
why human beings exists to save from ourselves. It would be almost
like it wasn't over and the pain would stop.
Everything
04:07 | 0 Comments
I do not
deny myself, I just sit down and write about it, until I expose to myself. I
might be more trouble than I look, Just keeping it real. And it’s the only way I
know how. I’m fine, I’m disgusted with my life and myself,
but I’m not unhappy about that.
It’s like living beyond my means. Of
course I do have those days where I feel like tired and about to fall out, and I’m
in deeply in touch with those emotions. And definitely there are some images which I
don’t want floating around my head, but they seem like a bullet in my head,
except with less ice.
Life is complicated, and that’s all I’ve got. The person
that I want to have everything to do with, wants nothing to do with me. The
woman that I love is out there and I know I can't have her. It’s quite hard even get up in the morning.
But the booze is always helpful and so is the art. Everything that I write is
either for her or about her. So I'm with her, even when I'm not.
Shadow
09:23 | 0 Comments
Many times I feel like the good Lord
picked me up with his bare hands, laid me down on the bed of rusty nails,
pinned me ankles behind my ears and just punched on my chest. I fool myself into
thinking that, I can fix things, I can make her come back. It hurts when I see
my close friends being in the same dark and all I can do for them is nothing. I
know I’m a big fan of the bye bye pain juice. These things make me easy,
not sleazy. I feel I’m in the worst invention ever. That’s just me.